Friday, November 16, 2007

Finding Self Worth

Well, let me start by saying I've received correction from a reader that men who choose younger women are not particularly doing so because it strokes their egos. It was the writer's opinion that younger women possess a certain "energy" older women lack, which they can find attractive. I could possibly argue that point, since I work over 40 plus hours a week on my regular job, work another part-time job from home, manage my blog and website, go to a gym almost daily, speed walk on treadmills, pump those weights, clean my home, take out my garbage, shop for myself, take care of my car, feed and walk the dog, and dispense all of my current energy into my own single life. Having said all that, I'm not sure what particular energy a younger woman would possess that I don't (unless of course you're referring to between the sheets). But, I'll let that argument drop and get to my blog for the week...

...which, by the way, brings me to the topic of finding worth in ourselves as singles. Depending on how we view our singleness, whether a blessing or a curse, it could affect how we feel about our own worth as individuals. Let's face it, we have people who look at us as deficient because we're unmarried. Then there are those of us who are divorced, who probably have that thumb and index finger to our foreheads in the shape of an "L" calling ourselves "losers." Then on the other end of the spectrum you might be like Steve Carrell in the movie Evan Almighty standing in front of the mirror every morning saying, "I'm successful, powerful, handsome, and happy." Self worth is all about how we view ourselves in the mirror of life.

Unfortunately, the world through media and advertisements sets for us their standards of worth and value as humans. Those standards usually include good looks, ideal weight, youthful appearance, and money. The reality is the majority of us do not possess all those ideals, and finding self worth can be a real challenge in the world today. Being loved, needed, accepted, and recognized are those things that build self worth in us as individuals. Some singles, however, don't have others giving them the positive feedback they need to feel good about themselves.

So what's the answer? Do we stand in the mirror every morning declaring we're successful, powerful, handsome (or beautiful), and happy or do we dig down deep inside of us and find that self worth in ourselves. I've learned that self worth must come from within me and how I believe my creator views me. As a Christian, I know I have value because Jesus saw enough worth in me to take my sinfulness and pay the penalty on the cross. Every day I have to remind myself not to let the world define who I am or, for that matter, the next man I might meet who doesn't find me attractive or skinny enough to be of value to him. My worth belongs to the one who created me, and I refuse to let the world and others define my value.